point of view

Today, I thank You for A home that was always open How many birthdays I heard the story of my birth again, how she became a mom for the first time, how she saw her own face when she looked at mine The pushing, prying, once in a while tears because she wanted to know how I was doing Pizza and ice cream in the freezer and the knowledge that we could invite first and inform her second For the big dreams and enthusiasm for our futures That she prays for us. For the tea, always tea The orchids in the window, pansies in the garden peace that was always at Oma's place Always the listening and the special treatment like she was so honored that you were there. The recurrent gathering again, how she is a magnet in the drawing together of our family All the hearts that have been under that roof The foster kids who still send a note every now and then For the niece who is mine in a small way For those who let me hold their babies and rejoice with them For all the kids who...

how can I explain this so that you understand how it picked up my world and spun it dizzy til, now, I see everything differently? how can I reduce to a mere few words something that still keeps me up nights lately the tears are so close to the surface and the weirdest things will break the dam it won't make sense to tell you that I still keep thinking of the vodka bottle in the middle of the road why I want to learn to dance well how much I miss the  warm fuzzy-headed weight on my chest? words fall so flat if I tell you what I saw and heard you might be shocked,  might say "how awful!" and you'd be right (though you probably won't feel it the way we did) but  that's not the point. image source  

So I was sitting in church the other week listening to an excellent sermon about the Thessalonians and the Church. As I listened I got more and more excited. I was thinking ‘wow, if we get a hold of this, this will change us forever.’ I glanced around to see if anyone else seemed to be getting this too. Maybe people were getting it but I will never know because there were four men sitting there with their eyes closed. Maybe they were meditating deeply. Ha, ha. Maybe they had a really late night or something. I don’t know. (Though I do know that the pastor had about two or three hours of sleep that night). The effect this sermon had on me was, I think, rather different than what the pastor had in mind originally. Do you identify with me? Have you had this happen? Do you know how totally discouraging it is to catch a glimpse of a vision of what our churches could be and then be rudely reminded that a lot of the key people in this could care less? If you know who these guys ...